Yet you can get yourself into even worse trouble if you commit a Freudian Send. This is when you send a message to the wrong person -- typically, the person you least wanted to receive it. For example, you want to be extra, super-duper careful if you are dating more than one woman. Sending a generic "you're fantastic!" to the wrong person isn't necessarily going to wreck anything, but sending "I loved that thing you did last night" to a woman you haven't called for a week is not going to make her day or yours.
Text messages are transient, fleeting thoughts that accumulate into a greater sense of connection and affection. Few people remember the exact wording of texts they have sent or received. Our phones only store so many and it's not like they are scented, handwritten love letters. If you receive or send awe inspiring text message I recommend saving it. In my journal I have written The Best Message Ever so I had it handy as an example, since I don’t even remember what I’ve texted today.
But I can tell you this. Every sentence in this article has no more than 160 characters. So, you really can say a lot with so little.
1. Mix it up. Be romantic, funny, erotic, and matter-of-fact.
2. Use abbreviations sparingly, but use them when you need them.
3. In the beginning of a new relationship, let her set the tone.
4. Sometimes it's hotter to use the longer word rather than the shorter one.
5. Triple-check the recipient's address BEFORE you press send.
6. It's better to craft original text than paste canned phrases from a list. But it's okay to quote song lyrics, books, movies and anything else that holds meaning for the two of you.
7. Women are often more sexually explicit in text messages than they are out loud, at first.
8. You can send text messages to her phone from your computer at a site like www.txt2day.com
9. You know the relationship is going well if the two of you start developing an SMS shorthand all your own.
10. If texting becomes part of the foundation of your relationship, invest in a phone with a QWERTY keyboard.
Learn more about text lingo and translate between English and lingo at these sites:
http://transl8it.com/cgi-win/index.pl
The Woman’s Perspective:
Vicky
Honestly for me I want some flirt, some give and take, a bit of a game of chase, it's the interaction and play that makes it fun.
Alicia
Texting allows me to say things I won’t normally say to guys. I wait for their response and set the tone from there. At first it is just simple flirting then it can change to arousing pictures and playful prose. I am by no means a poet by texting allows me to get my point across, no matter how sexual it is, with just a few words!
The Man’s Perspective:
Regina: What is the most romantic text message you've ever sent?
Bill: "I don't care who you were. I know who you are."
Regina: What's the least romantic text message you've ever received?
Bill: "Come home now. Hospital."
Regina: What would you never say in a text message?
Bill: "I'm leaving you."
Regina: What do you wish your lover would say to you in a text message?
Bill: "Come take me now."
Devan, Age 22, Talks about texts he sent his girlfriend
When we first got together we were frequently texting dirty messages back and forth through our cell phones. It was a very significant part of our flirting and courtship. They ranged from "I can't wait until you can come over this evening" to pictures to probably the best message I ever received after a particular hot and hurried encounter. She sent me a message while I was playing pool with my pool league that read "OMG! I feel like I got run over by a Mack truck... in a good way!" I played much better than usual that evening but my opponents couldn't figure out why I couldn't stop smiling. We are still hot in our text communications to this day, and I have actually archived a fair amount of these messages, as they are the equivalent of instant love letters. Just as important as the longer emails and beautiful hand-penned notes that we exchange as a way to let each other know we love each other.
Read of about Gina Lynn at www.reginalynn.com. You can also read her weekly column Sex Drive at wired.com and she is also the author of The Sexual Revolution 2.0.
